Saturday, November 22, 2008

We told you so

Archbishop Oscar Cruz said so. “Those who are thinking about elections in 2010 had better stop…as soon as Congress re-opens on November 10, they will start cha-cha all over again”, he said during the open forum that followed the October 28 pronunciamento of the five bishops led by CBCP President Angel Lagdameo.

The Former Senior Government Officials (FSGO) warned about it as early as September this year. Gloria is bent to extend her stay in her beloved stinking palace by the stinking river.

I have been telling you so in this space, months and months before too---there won’t be elections the way we thought it would be in --- 2010.

Last Tuesday, in the cabinet meeting, Jesus Dureza let our a Freudian slip, in prayer at that. And his Boss Woman, surprised at the effrontery (audacity to her though) of Dureza, was, if you watched the facial English, “kilig to the bones!” as a former cabinet official of hers observed.

Now, le chat is out of le sac! As of 3 p.m. Thursday, 163 signatures had been collected by El Hijo --- Mikey. Only 16 to go. Followed by the appearance in their “rump” constituent assembly of two or three senators, to give rump a patina of legitimacy. Then the other senators run to the Supreme Court, where the vote, if held today, could likely be 9-6 in favour of a “joint” assembly voting as “one”. Ah, the scenario painted by Ronnie the Tree, with Ed Ermita secretly assenting, even if he’s mad that it was Ronnie and not he who first thought of it. And of course, the Tatlong Itlog, the hallelujah chorus of Cerge Remonde, Jess Dureza and Dodie Limcaoco singing, “And she shall rule…forever and ever!”

Tom Alcanatara tells the very few who care to listen to him yet --- “No, she just doesn’t want to be treated like a lame duck…that’s the reason for all this”. Lokohin mo si Romy Neri.

* * *

As this is a weekend column, let me segue to an e-mailed letter, complete with a re-worded Platters (remember them?) song, from reader Ding Generoso:

“First, she took the name of the Lord in vain when she proclaimed before the whole world in a TIME interview, “The Lord put me here”.

Now comes her press secretary and chief spokesman, someone ironically named “Jesus”, praying before television cameras for God to “bless the President, so she will have the forbearance, good health, tolerance (such choice of words…tinitiis pala ni Gloria ang trabaho niya?) to lead this nation up to 2010, and perhaps who knows, even beyond”.
“Jesus!!! What grave a sin, for Dureza’s sake, have Filipinos committees to deserve nine and a half years of Gloria’s misrule, and a factotum wishing us more?

“What can you expect from Dureza? He simply took seriously Gloria’s self-proclamation about being God’s anointed like the kings and emperors of old did.”

“Dureza’s prayer was supposed to be “off the record”, according to Arroyo. That’s probably because in secret, Gloria has been praying:

Composed by the Cha-Cha Plotters (with apologies to the real Platters)

When the Senate is gone and my House reps are singing,
When the Supreme Court is mine, joy comes into my heart.
And in my Palace I will stay … while I pray.

My prayer is to stay in power
At the end of my term, and beyond 2010…

My prayer is a new ten-year term
As your Prime Minister, and for life if I can.

Tonight while the nation’s asleep,
Oh tell me the words that I'm longing to know

My prayer, and the answer you give
May I always be Prez, for as long as I live…

That I will still be here at the end of ma..haayy… term.

“I’m sure”, Ding perorates, “the Lord has a sense of humour and my prayer was in that context” he quotes Dureza, who later told media that he was “just kidding”. But while to me, he sounded more like mocking than joking”. After all, the bishops seem to have taken his twisted sense of humour with a quiet smile” (Hindi naman lahat, si Rosales at Vidal, Villena at Talamayan, De Pueblos at Capalla…oops, parami nang parami!)

“But if Pontius Pilate were around, he would have ordered Dureza crucified at the altar of Malacanang to serve as a lesson to those who, in their prayers, wish the nation ill”.

“ On the other hand, if the real Jesus were still around and had not been impaled, He would have prayed, “Forgive my tokayo, Lord, for he knows not what he says.”

“As for me, I’d just paraphrase Dureza and ask God: “Bless the Filipino people so they will have the forbearance and tolerance to endure Gloria and Dureza—and not rise up in arms—until noon of June 30 2010. And, Lord, I’m not kidding.”

Amen, amen…hallelujah…Amen!

* * *

My parents had a quandary about my name when I was born, on Christmas day. They were thinking of “Jesus”, but my Lola said, “What happens when you get angry at the boy, you might blaspheme”. And it was she who chose “Angelito”. Trouble is, they wrote that in the birth certificate, instead of “Angel”, so even at my age, I have to be a “little angel”.

So my mom thinks nothing of blasphemy when she raged against naughty me.

* * *

The last word comes from Chief Justice Reynato Puno, who is always lyrically eloquent: “The question is whther the Lord is listening to his (Dureza’s) prayer”.

Laudamus Te!